THAT KISS (1890)

TWO TEEN-AGERS DATING IN HIGH SCHOOL, SHARING A CLASS

SHARING LOOKS, CHATS, SMILES, COME HITHER, LEARNING ABOUT HOW TO’S AND EACH OTHER

GOOD LOOKING, CONSUMMATE, DERANGED CHILDHOODS BOTH–BUT SANE ENOUGH TO SEE THE LIGHT IN EACH OTHER

WHO COULD KNOW THAT SUCH BEGINNINGS, LUNCH AND SCIENCE TECHNIQUES, COULD SPAWN LIFE-LONG ATTACHMENT

DESPITE DISTANCE, DIFFERENT COLLEGES, DIFFERENTIAL CITIES, EVEN OPPOSING TEMPERAMENTS

AND GROW CLOSER AND STRONGER OVER THE YEARS, TILL THE TWO ARE ONE: FAMILY OF CHOICE, NOT BLOOD.

 

BUT THAT NIGHT IN 1890 REMAINED APART FROM ALL OTHERS: THAT KISS WAS SOUL SHATTERING

HOW DOES ONE TRANSCEND THE SEARING MEMORY OF A LOVE BORN IN HEAT, OF REPRESSION, OF WANT…

IT WAS A FULL MOON, SPRING BREEZE, UNDER A TREE ON PELHAM PARKWAY, A PARTY IN FORCE

THAT HE LET THE FULL EMOTION SPRING FORTH UNFETTERED AND SHE ANSWERED IN WAYS THAT A TEEN WOULD EAGERLY UNDERSTAND…ALONE WE STOOD,

GRABBING MY FREE-FLOWING LOCKS AND PLANTING A KISS FOR THE AGES, LONG AND WET, SWEET IN A WAY OF LONG-SIMMER, AND HOLDING MY BUNS, GRINDING AGAINST…AND KNOWING WE WERE TO BE LOVERS, NOT MERELY FRIENDS. 

THERE WAS NO MISTAKING THE MUTUAL PASSION OF TWO TEENS IN LOVE AND HEAT SIMULTANEOUSLY

WAITING FOR THE RIGHT MOMENT TO SWOOP DOWN AND CONSUMMATE THE UNION BORN OF THAT KISS IN ANOTHER LIFETIME.

THE KARMA OF THAT UNION DEMANDS THAT THE TWO BECOME ONE, AS IT WAS MEANT TO BE, IN ANOTHER PLACE AND TIME, EVEN IN ANOTHER BODY, WHEN THE TWO SOULS ARE REBORN IN OTHER BODIES. THE TWO WILL FIND EACH OTHER AGAIN AND THE RESULTS WILL BE DIFFERENT, BECAUSE FATE MEANS IT TO BE THIS WAY.

KISMET= FATE. AND THE SOUL INHABITING THIS BODY FEELS IT AGAIN, AS IF IT HAS BEEN DOWN THIS PATH BEFORE, AND CRIES OUT FOR THE UNION.

IT CANNOT BE AN EPISODE, A BLIP IN A LONG HISTORY. THE TEST IS IN THE GROWTH OF THE TWO AS THE RELATIONSHIP HAS GROWN TO THAT OF A FINE WINE, TREASURED AS RARE, REFINED AS IT HAS ENDURED THAT INITIAL PASSION, AND BECOME BETTER, AS ONE THAT EACH SEES AS A GIFT, WHICH WOULD ALMOST CERTAINLY WOULD NOT HAVE HAPPENED HAD THE PASSION BEEN SPENT ON THAT ONE NIGHT. 

THE TRAJECTORY WOULD HAVE BEEN BRIEF, TRANSITORY, PARTING AS THE INITIAL THRUST FLAMES OUT AND THE FIGHT ENDS ALL, FOR LACK OF INTEREST TO SUSTAIN THAT WHICH IS SPENT SO EASILY.

SO THE ANCESTOR IN ME REJOICES THAT THE CONSUMMATION IS YET TO COME, AND IT WILL BE DOM PERIGNON SIPPING WITH GODIVA TRUFFLES ON SILK SHEETS, AND THOU, READY TO HUNT, AND ME, READY TO YIELD.  

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THAT SMILE

Who can measure the evolution of a smile?

From one of pleased to meet you, to curiosity, to a smirk

Smacking of knowing more than is spoken

To a gleeful chant in the eyes, to pure happiness

Radiant with the knowledge of love given and taken.

Such have I witnessed on the face of my beloved

Made all the more poignant by capturing the looks on film.

I carry him everyday in my dreams, my heart and in my wallet

Right next to thousands potentially spent through credit cards.

If one of them is gold, he is platinum

If others smile for the pose, his is more

Because in that moment, he was happy with me

And his happiness meant more to me than my own.

 

We play the game of the willing slave and master

I do his bidding and he is amused

I feel useful and appreciated even though I am obeying his will

Acting as though I have not one of my own

Because this way I am permitted to bring him pleasure

And I know he is not immune to my wiles

For in so doing, I entangle him in the confusion of a thousand emotions

Some intensely negative and others passionate.

 

We dare not touch or press the heated flesh while alone

Much too close to the hands of evil adultery

 For he is already married to another in word, if not in deed

And I must find what I seek in someone else’s arms

Even though he really owns me, body and soul

With his words and that look in his eyes. 

 

BAKED CLAMS

Please allow me to open you up

Remove the succulent loveliness of you from your shell

Caress the sweetness of your clams

Counting the gold and watching the sugar plum fairies dance in your eyes

As I draw you into my warm, protective arms.

I will give you everything you seek if you will but let me in

Into your stony, resistant heart, mind and body.

All the gates will open with the right words

But you must speak veritably from the heart

Or else I will know you for a phony, out only for the money.

 

Climb into my bed when the heart overflows

Let the river run: love is wet

So is birth, death, a good workout and  fine wine to ease nerves.

Come with me on the wondrous journey of life

When hungry, eat; when thirsty, drink; when hurt, console;

When happy, rejoice with me for I am only there for you

Because I want to be, because I love you.

KNOWLEDGE

The Washington Monument met up with the jellyfish.

They melded and formed protoplasm.

The progeny yelped with delight

Upon its discovery of independence.

The little ramshackle announced it would go to college

to become a mystery to thong-clad masses of hormones.

The Papa-san Sphinx decided to have a talk with his biological issue.

“Son, the world is yours if you know how to play the game well. Now I will teach you how.”

And so the monstrous messenger went off to enroll

With the secrets the obelisk had taught him.

INQUIETUDE

Insistent yet honest

Purposeless, meaning nothing?

Full of temptation yet despair

Subconscious yearnings revealing themselves

Only in sleep, in body language, not words.

What we are told is only a fraction of what we know;

Too many drinks permit a look inside.

 

I look in a mirror and I see you in my face.

I wake and see you not beside me in my bed.

I know there is more than what you’ve told me

And I wonder if you will ever summon the courage

to tell me you feel the same.

 

 

Many other things get in the way.

Dimlighting our path, making it crooked.

We know we’re not sister and brother and we gain much from the other,

even as it is.

Yet it could be so much more…will the moon shine on us once more

and will you ever hold me the way you did so long ago?

 

Perchance not. Still I am better for having known you…

You who have invaded my soul and my dreams.

Fear not, I will maintain my distance in order not to endanger

our dear friendship, but this is yet another link in my many chains…

 

 

A TRANSFORMATION

Somnolent musings upon erased blackboards
Etchings of graffiti, of a past gone awry
Struggling to clasp untidy tendrils of hair
Into the enforced order of a barrette
But the strings of hair remain untamed
Even if they’re in their place.

Such is the chaos of disorder and death
To chart into murky waters with a life raft holding you up
Each day bringing a bit of joy or another lump of sorrow
Knowing not where we journey but that we are on a sea
That our captain is Providence
And He will take us where we mean to go.
Only we must steer straight and avoid the dark corners of the soul.
Do not let greed, envy or jealousy dictate your actions
Or the drowning will be your own body and soul.

Serve only honesty and truth, not hurt, at the table of life
Share in your good fortune with the many less fortunate
Tainted lucre turned into food and shelter for the needy
If only we can remember to not be too greedy.

THIS I DID FOR YOU

WHEN I INVITED YOU TO DINNER FOR TWO AT MY HOME
YOU WERE DELIGHTED YET A BIT SUSPICIOUS.
CANDLELIT, HOME COOKED FROM ONE WHO WANTS TO GIVE ONLY THE BEST
WHO IS A MASTER AT THE ART OF SEDUCTION
DRESSED IN A FLOWERED SILK KIMONO, BASTING BELOW
TO CATEGORICALLY BRIGHT FUCHSIA LIGHTS JUST FOR ATMOSPHERE
I DECLARED THAT COOKING FOR ME IS AN ACT OF LOVE
OF ALMOST INTENSITY, OF ALMOST INTIMACY
FOR I BAKE, CHITTER AND DREAM OF YOUR RESPONSE TO IT.

WHITE WINE, FLAMBEED LEMON SOLE, SALAD ALL COLORS, SERVED ON FINE CHINA
RECIPEED CRANBERRY SAUCE, CANDIED SWEET POTATOES, ALL GOOEY WITH MARSHMELLOWS
WARM AND STICKY CINNAMON BUNS, CHAMPAGNE AND A GODIVA GRANDE MINT
TO FINISH, GOBLETS, STERLING SILVERWARE AND THOU, MY TEA CRUMPET.

ANOTHER NIGHT, FRESH GARLIC AND ONIONS MINCED BY MY HAND, SAUTEED WITH PORTOBELLO MUSHROOMS IN OLIVE OIL WHERE EACH PEEL,
STIR AND CHOP IS AN ACT OF LOVE FOR YOU.
TO CONTEMPLATE TENDER POT ROAST SERVED GERMAN FROM THE UPPER EAST SIDE BUT COOKED BY ME FOR YOU IN OUR KITCHEN.
I WOULD NOT DO THIS FOR EVERYBODY AND ALL THE PAYMENT I REQUIRE
IS YOUR SINCERE SMILE FOR WHAT I HAVE GIVEN YOU: MY EFFORTS AND MY LOVE.

EAT SWEET, BELOVED, BUT WATCH HOW AND WHERE YOU BITE DOWN.